Christmas revised

Yesterday we celebrated our first Christmas as parents of a child who was old enough to be aware of what was going on around him.  What a difference a child makes in how the parents experience the season.   Personally I am of the Christian faith and so for me the focus of the season is to celebrate the birth of Jesus.   Bec ause I am now a parent,  and have an appreciation for what that means that I never had before,  the magnitude of that gift has much more poignancy now.

Watching Logan enjoy the holiday yesterday was a joy I couldn’t comprehend before I became a parent.   Christmas is for children.   I firmly believe now that you cannot fully experience the joy the season has to offer unless you are able to share the experience with your child.  I’ve shared it with nieces and nephews that I love dearly but the experience is not the same as it is when you share it with your own child.  So, as I’ve done before,  I feel compelled to thank Logan’s birth mother and father for allowing Michelle and I this opportunity.

I’ve posted a few new pictures.

Birthday

Today is Logan’s first birthday.  We had a party for him on Sunday, and he was introduced to birthday cake, and more importantly, icing.  Michelle made a castle cake with a fondant (think sheet of icing) made out of marshmallows.  When Logan got his piece of cake, he pulled the icing off with one hand and stuffed as much as humanly possible in his mouth.  His expression said it all, “What is this new and delicious thing you’ve hidden from me my whole life!?!” Friends and family were very generous with their gifts, and Logan has been having a ball with his new toys.  The thing that made me laugh the most was the fact that we evidently have not been teaching him “southern ways” adequately. He received a pair of camouflage overalls, a camo onesie, and a John Deere tractor to scoot around on.  Personally, I find the picture of him in his camo overalls astride his John Deere with no shirt on absolutely hysterical.

He continues to progress as you would expect.  He pulled up to standing for the first time on Sunday.  He’ll take awkward steps if you hold his hands or support him under the arms.  It won’t be long at all until he is running.

Everyone always says that once you have kids, your life changes forever.  That is such an all-encompassing statement that you really can’t grasp what it means until it happens to you.  As I think about how my life has changed in the past year I cannot think of a single aspect that is not different.  Just as a very mild “for instance” ; I have one picture of my wife on my desk…..I have two of Logan on my bulletin board, he is my computer background, and my cell phone background.  He is the first person I speak to every morning.  I think about his needs before my own always.  I look forward to seeing him every evening, and playing with him.  When I see him in the evenings for the first time and his bright smile lights up his face and he comes crawling toward me as fast as he can, my heart just swells with love.  All this and he can’t talk, or walk yet.

Adopting him has been the single best thing I’ve ever done with my life.  I am changed forever and for the better.  On this one year anniversary of that life changing event, just in case she is reading this let me say to you, Logan’s birth mom, I am forever grateful to you.  I know your motivation was to do what was best for him, and I will never forget that it is my obligation to always do my absolute best for him to honor your decision.  Thank you!

You can’t plan for everything.

One thing no one shared with me to expect was that kids get colds from other kids, and they easily transmit those germs to those who care for them.  He hasn’t quite learned to cover his mouth when he coughs yet.   As a result, I haven’t been writing much lately because I’ve been under the weather again.  This time it merited a trip to the doctor.  Bronchial pneumonia is not fun.  Logan does have a cold,  but nothing like what that little bug did to me.    The worst part about being sick, is that I have to stay at arm’s length from Logan.  This bug is nothing to take lightly, and so I’m being careful to not expose him or Michelle.   It is crazy how much you can miss the company of someone who can’t speak, walk,  or do much of anything on his own.   Hopefully I will be over this bug in time for his birthday.

Mobility

Logan is moving out of the stage where he is nearly always content to be held.  He wants to move around and explore his world.  It is fun to watch, because it is obvious he wants to be able to stand up and open up new options for things to get into.  My mother used to joke that there was no point in buying toys for me, when I could have as much fun or more with a big box.  Logan hasn’t had the chance to explore any big boxes yet, but he will ignore the most colorful, thoughtfully designed to engage a child toy ever invented in favor of any type of electric containing cord.  Be it a cord for a lamp, a laptop, a phone charger, he will find them.  At this point I’m grateful that the era of VCRs is pretty much over. I can see him sticking his hands inside one very easily.  He is a STRONG little guy too!  We got cat litter in the jumbo bucket size the other day.  I set it in a spot intending to take it elsewhere shortly.  He found it, and was pulling the handle and moving a 25lb bucket, and he was in a crawling position!  This wasn’t leverage, it was strength!  Imagine a determined little guy with that kind of arm power and grip going after my glasses, and you can picture what happens every time I pick him up lately.  That is another thing I’ve noticed developing in him lately is his determination.  When he wants something, he does not give up trying to get it. I don’t use that quality to tease him, but I have to admit that I have laughed at him trying to reach a cord he could see, but couldn’t touch because a piece of furniture was in his way.  He makes funny noises when he is frustrated.  Hopefully that doesn’t make me a bad parent.  I didn’t let him struggle long, just a couple of seconds.  Needless to say, outlet protectors are everywhere in our home now.

As we approach a full year of parenting, I never imagined how my life would change, and my only regret is having not done it sooner.  I am at the right place in my life now to be a good, patient, and calm parent, and I think that is probably more important than the fact that I’m a bit older.  To all my friends who read this, and have clear memories of me saying I would never be a parent…..I was wrong.  I just didn’t understand.  What an amazing, life altering, life enhancing, extraordinarily rewarding first year this has been.

Beating a dead horse?

Maybe because I look for them, but maybe because I choose to be an optimist, I consistently find little things that Logan does to be immensely rewarding.   Like most 10 (nearly 11) month olds, he jabbers quite a bit, but he isn’t saying actual words yet.   I firmly believe he communicates nevertheless.   I referenced this behavior in an earlier post, Logan always responds to me when I make a popping noise with my mouth.   He responds by making the same noise, and we go back and forth for a few moments.   It doesn’t matter if he can see me or not, if he hears that noise, he will stop what he is doing and respond.   Likewise, when I hear him do it first, I stop and respond.   I’ve watched him, and sometimes he does it when he thinks I’m not paying attention to him.   Sometimes I do it to get his attention away from something he shouldn’t be getting into.   The odd thing is, he doesn’t seem to do it with other people.   I think he finds it comforting because when I respond, he knows for sure that I’m paying attention to him even if I’m in the next room preparing his dinner or something.   All of this explanation was setting the stage for something that happened the other night when I put him to bed.   He almost always goes down without any kind of fuss, and is quiet when we turn out the lights and close the door. The normal bedtime routine had proceeded as normal, and as I turned off the lights, he made the pop noise, just once, and I responded just once.   It felt like he was saying, “Good night Dad, I love you.” in our special little language.  I know I’m reading into it….but it warmed my heart.

Guilt is a good motivator.

One of my regular readers and very dear friends pointed out to me that my postings of late had been, “infrequent”.   Sorry.  I could make excuses, but it would be just that, so instead I’ll just say I’ll try to do better.    Writing a blog post is something I try to do when I’m inspired to say something rather than just present a laundry list of what has been going on in our lives.   I was amused that several of our friends commented on some photos I shared with them when they said that Logan looks like us.  I’ve not met or seen pictures of the birth father, but the birth mother did tell us that I look a lot like him.   With that being said, I’ve added several pictures to the October folder in the family photos link to the right.   Logan is crawling now in his own way.   He started out primarily rolling to get from one place to another.  Now he does an army crawl sort of thing.  He uses his elbows and legs and manages to get where he wants to go.   The dogs and cats are all on alert.  Buck, Logan’s self-appointed protector dog continues to prove to be amazingly patient and loving toward Logan which never ceases to amaze me.   Tonight Logan was trying to get Buck’s collar tags (I was 6 inches away and watching the whole interaction intently don’t worry) and Buck simply let him grab the tags and pull, and twist his collar and make all sorts of noises.  When Logan decided he was done, Buck licked him.   I have a feeling that once Logan starts walking and running, he and Buck are going to be nearly inseparable.

Michelle and I have not taken the opportunity to be away from Logan and have him stay with a baby sitter who wasn’t a family member until this past week.  A wonderful neighbor agreed to look after our little man so we could take an evening and go to a show.  When we got back and got the report from Denyce on Logan, it affirmed what we’ve been saying all along,  he is wonderful.  Denyce has two kids of her own, and she was astounded  by just how easy-going, happy and mellow was.   It is nice to get a second, impartial opinion verifying what we had come to believe.  We are very very lucky to have him, and I am grateful every day to his birth mother.   Thanks to her if she is reading this. (the birth father too, if by some chance he reads this too)

Halloween

I think it is a carryover from a girl’s days playing with dolls and playing

dress up, that they feel they are somehow obligated to dress up their

children in cute little Halloween outfits. Don’t get me wrong, Logan was

positively adorable in his little lion outfit.  Michelle took a picture of him

wearing it, and the expression on his face says, “I will remember this, and

someday I will be making your healthcare decisions.  Revenge is a dish best

served cold.”  I fear the day he sees the pictures.  It could be worse.  I am

12 years younger than my only brother, so I was the annoying little brother

whenever he brought a date home.  I will never forget his most effective

method for getting me to leave he and his date alone.  He got out the

family photo album, and showed his date a picture of me butt naked

hanging from my top bunk of my bunk beds.  Game, set, match.  I hope

Logan doesn’t learn from his uncle.

Things I’ve learned.

Having been a father now for 10 months,  I’ve learned a few things.  For your education or more likely amusement, allow me to share a few of the things I’ve learned.   Oh, and for you regular readers, Logan is back to his normal happy self.

1.  The amount you spend on a new outfit for a child is directly proportional to how quickly it will be ruined.

2.  No matter how hard you try, there is no way to completely remove a “#2″ type stain from an expensive white shirt.

3.  No matter how much your child likes mandarin oranges, feeding them an entire can is a mistake.  (see #1 and #2)

4.  Introduce new foods in small amounts first.   Logan really likes cheese, the day we learned this, my shirt was “decorated” twice .

5. No matter how well concealed you THINK you’ve made a cord, a determined, curious infant will find it.

6. Once your child becomes able to move of their own free will beyond simply rolling around, everything becomes a potential toy.

7.  Cats are leary of infants.  (see #6)

8. Men, no matter the age, are fascinated by remote controls.

9.  Do not bother purchasing an outfit for the child that fits perfectly today.   By tomorrow it won’t fit at all.

10.  There are different crys, learn their meanings quickly.

11. Babies do not understand gravity, and trust you implicitly to make sure their introduction to it is not a negative experience.

12.  YOU may think a toy is really cool, your opinion means nothing.

13. Never give your child a bath when you are fully dressed for work.  That is a guarantee that you will end up wet.

14. Children who can’t speak still find effective ways to let you know they do not like certain foods.  Logan’s preferred method is projectile

spitting.  Protect yourself accordingly.

15. There is a direct relationship between the degree of horror found in a diaper and the amount of movement the child will demonstrate while trying to change said diaper.

16. Booger suckers are vile and disgusting, but effective.

17. Baby teeth HURT when used to bite your fingers.

18. No matter how hard you try, and how much attention you pay to your child, you cannot protect them from everything.

19. Do not play airplane with your child if they have recently eaten or drunk anything.

20. All kids develop at their own pace.  Don’t pay too much attention to what the books say your child should be doing by “x” week.

21. Kids will amaze you with what they absorb from you, friends, and their environment.   When I make a popping noise with my mouth, Logan imitates me.  Make sure you are providing a good example, because even when you don’t think they are doing so, they are paying attention.

22.  Diaper blowouts will happen to you.   They are horrifying.   Get over it.  The kid can’t clean themself up, and all other parents understand what you’re dealing with, because they’ve done it too.

23.  When your child scrunches up their face and makes “uhhhhh” noises, they are pooping, count on it.

24.  Learn your child’s signals for “I’m tired” it will make your life much easier.

25.  Your life has never been more fulfilling, challenging, and fast paced.  Hold on tight, it flies by.

Mr. Mom

Well, Mr. Logan is not feeling well at the moment.  It started yesterday, he had a fever, so we called the doctor and did what we needed to do in order to bring his fever down.  On Monday, I stayed home from work to be with the little guy because Michelle had a full plate of things she needed to do.  His fever was much lower today, and we went to the doctor.  It isn’t the swine flu, and it isn’t strep throat, but it is a virus of some kind.  The doc said he needed to spend the next few days taking it easy….not that a baby who can’t yet walk has particularly strenuous days.  I honestly thought being at home with him all day would be a real test of my patience, but it was surprisingly heart warming.    He wanted to be held,  and was more snuggly than ususal.   The two of us hung out and played a bit, and he napped a lot.  It is evening as I write this and he is acting likehe feels better.  The doc said to give it several days and hope he feels better.   In the meantime, I get to be needed.

A good day.

The state recognized us as Logan’s parents  today.  A loving birth mother and a wonderful baby boy made us a Mom and Dad nearly 10 months ago.

I posted a video in the family photos section of  Logan laughing.  It makes me smile every time I watch it.